No one enters a relationship with the idea of transcending the boundaries of loyalty. It always begins with the idea of rainbows and butterflies and happily ever-after’s. But once the honeymoon period is over, the mundane realities of life hit you like a bolt out of the blue. As you begin to unravel the layers of your spouse’s personality, you may realize they are a lot different from what you understood them to be. In the midst of this turmoil, a friend request from a long lost love interest can rekindle a sense of excitement. It all begins with a nostalgia-ridden trip down memory lane and soon escalates to harmless flirting.Before you know, you are perpetually hooked to your smartphone, sharing every little aspect of your life, down to the details of what you ate for breakfast, with that ‘blast from the past’ or an unknown stranger you befriended online. Rules that maintain the sanctity of a relationship are bulldozed and an illicit affair takes form.
This isn’t an isolated situation of a personal circumstance but a reality that holds our romantic relationships at ransom. Which brings us to a pertinent question: has internet made infidelity easier?
Internet encourages Adultery and How
Think of a time before the internet and smartphones became a household commodity. In order to have a romantic liaison outside your relationship, you would need to communicate through fixed line phones and meet your love interest in person, and then have a good alibi to cover your tracks. The risk of being caught red-handed or found out was abysmally high. Besides, maintaining an adulterous relationship required too much effort. And one wouldn’t go through all that hard work unless one had really fallen head over heels for someone despite being in a relationship.
Cut to the smartphone age, you can actually be sitting across the table from your spouse or partner and be constantly chatting with a love interest. Hit the delete button and you are covered. The ease and accessibility has what made infidelity so enchanting in the present times. Add to that, the hectic lifestyle and mounting crunch to spend quality time with your partner, and the need to seek love, appreciation and comfort outside a relationship becomes that much more compelling.
It is also the realization that there is an alternative lurking around the corner that makes the forbidden fruit of adulterous relationship so enchanting. Instead of working one’s way through a rough patch in a relationship, a lot of people today prefer finding solace in the novelty of an affair.
Once the idea sticks, there is no dearth of options for realizing your fantasies. It takes one internet search on ‘popular sites for extramarital’ to flood your screen with a plethora of alternatives to choose from. From ‘Top 5 Sites for Extramarital Affairs’ to ‘10 Best Adultery Dating Sites’ and direct links to extramarital dating sites, every tiny bit of information you need to have an affair without being caught or found out is just a click away.
And then there are colleagues, old friends and exes who you can reach out to through instant messengers, and flare up an affair in a matter of moments. The ease and convenience of it all makes transgression both practical and exciting.
Research blames it on the Internet too
Social media and dating sites and apps catered to help people have successful affairs have made the internet the convenient scapegoat for a spate in number of people cheating on their partners. Even though extra martial affairs existed even before the advent of internet, researchers claim the era of technology has oversimplified things for those looking to indulge in some ‘harmless fun’ outside their marriages/relationships. According to a survey conducted by psychology professors, Naomi Moller and Andreas Vossler from The Open University, people who have indulged in virtual infidelity agreed that technology has, in fact, made cheating easier. Some of the participants in the anonymous survey also likened virtual affairs to fast food. With all this technology around us, having an affair can be oddly comforting and sexy, the respondents of the survey agreed.
According to the findings of another survey conducted by US-based Pew Research Centre across 40 countries in 2014, a whopping 62 per cent Indians agreed to have no qualms in indulging in extramarital affairs.
Whether the rise of dating sites has triggered adulterous relationships or is a mere manifestation of an age-old human instinct to crave novelty in love and relationships are a matter of another debate. But it can be safely concluded that the cloak of anonymity and the convenience of accessibility lures more and more people toward polyamory.
A journalist by profession and a freelancer by choice, she is most content in company of words. Between writing, reading, hitting the road and exploring food, she also juggles roles as an army wife and mommy.