With love – from a daughter-in-law.
Friends, at the time of one’s marriage, it is every girl’s desire to have a dream boy as a perfect match: who would accordingly complete her life in the way that she has always dreamt, imagined, and watched in films or movies and read in fiction or books.
In order to make this dream come true, she is happily and willingly ready to embrace every aspect of life and to go through all the unexpected ups and downs that may have been strewn along her path. So, while most of us, go through this inevitable transition of life thinking it to be a not-so-happy experience: I want to share with you a different perspective.
All marriages are made in heaven, they say. As for me, I can say that my marriage was indeed made in heaven. When I realized my dream love story, it was sealed with an amazing gift: which was even more precious than all the wonderful gifts that I received during the marriage itself!
For me, this is also an extraordinary relationship that I share with a loving person who came into my life during what I would call as a definitive and a transformative stage of one’s life. This person is my mother-in-law, but it is with great love and with much adulation that I call her my new mother.
So as I begin to pen down, I ask myself a question about where and how to begin? This is because in these years my new mom has touched my life in such beautiful and myriad ways that it becomes almost difficult to select and pinpoint only a few of them. Yet I will try in my own humble way to do justice.
The unexpected proposal.
I clearly remember. It was the year 2014 when I had gone for my favorite pilgrimage. It was there that I had asked my patron saint to grant me one of my wishes during the coming year: The first one was to grant me the gift of marriage with a good prospect. And the second one was: to help me go abroad to fulfill my dreams of further studies in my chosen field. That day I had prayed to Him with all my heart. It was after completing my prayers, that I returned home both happy and contented.
While on my way back, little did I know that my life was about to change. Little did I realize then that an unbelievable miracle was about to happen; and that my prayers had indeed been answered and accepted: in a most beautiful and intrinsic way!
Yes, it was within six months of this incident that I received the most-awaited proposal for marriage.
Needless to say, my parents were happy and delighted. But I was overjoyed for two reasons: one was because I got an opportunity to live life in a new city and secondly, I could realize my dream of living partially on my own in a place away from my home. By all means with the grace of God, I was ready to embrace a fresh new beginning and start a beautiful chapter of my life!
All about my new life and learning:
When I got married and came, my new family and parents, embraced me and accepted me whole-heartedly.
On my part, I wanted to make sure that it was also a time and an opportunity for me to learn, introspect, and grow in my life. The most important step I took towards achieving this end was to watch and emulate my new mom in her ways: related to home, work, life, love, community, etc. Slowly but gradually I started learning from my new mom: small things that she almost always did in really big, immeasurable ways!
My new mom is a daring lady, and many times she has illustrated this by standing up for what is just, true, and absolutely worthy in life. This trait of hers is what I want to hold very close to my heart, and start to practice in every sphere of my life: whether small or big, tiny or mammoth.
Furthermore, its always a sheer pleasure to watch mom when she communicates through her refined and impactful, calm but firm words: I have noticed time and again that her speech goes miles and miles in winning everyone’s hearts! Nowadays, whether speaking to customers at work or to any loved ones at home: I always try to smile and communicate happy vibes while sharing my message with genuine eye contact: which I must say has definitely added a sheen to my personality, made me a better communicator and most importantly: made me a more loving and amicable person.
Mummy has always been a business person. Her dignified dealings with customers, her caring attitude towards workers and Karigars (tailoring and embroidery specialists), and her meticulous and methodical delivery of work vouch for her ability to be a people’s person. Hats off to her.
Apart from this, what I really admire about mummy is her inner drive and passion to teach me quite tirelessly. And ultimately when I learn and achieve her level of perfection, she is able to participate and celebrate in my success by giving me due credit. Indeed it is only someone of her caliber who can think and act selflessly.
If there is one thing that mummy holds proudly and beautifully in her precious armament: it is her radiant smile. It is with this smile of hers that she is able to conquer many difficult moments in her life: those moments that many would dispense off as unpleasant or even unwanted. But only mummy can take the best out of such moments and enjoy them to the core. This is something I always want to absorb in my life and embrace in my own day-to-day conquests: whether it is related to life, love, or work.
Another fascinating aspect of mom is her unrelenting ability to simply complete a monotonous task without a single or even logical break. It is with much fondness that I love to watch her blend her zestful creativity along with the perfect amount of meticulousness in everything that she creates: whether a dress, a piece of artistic delight, or even a tasty dish.
Whenever mummy introduces me to her friends: she does so by saying: ‘meet my daughter.’ Trust me, it is indeed a heart-warming moment when a daughter-in-law is addressed like that!
Trusting others is easy, but to trust oneself is rather difficult. Time and again, I have watched mummy closely and observed one amazing thing about her… In her times of triumph as much as in her difficulty: mummy has stood her ground always, kept up her word strongly, and trusted her own gut feelings which come to her very naturally. I am happy and proud to say that: it is time and always that she has emerged as a winner: with her positive thoughts, words, outlook, and action being her best ally, her power-tool, her shield, and also her comforter. From all the precious virtues that one can count together that makes her a truly outstanding person, it is this special and most inimitable quality that I want to continue to absorb, embrace and cherish in the years to come.
Adding cheer and color to everything around her:
Apart from all the learning, there is a fun side that I watch and observe about my new mom- her undying spirit to enjoy life wherever she is and whatever she does: whether it is lavish cooking at home or organizing an event, whether it is attending an overnight Hindi classical music session, or going on long uncomfortable road trips: I have seen her enjoy every bit of her me-time with joy and a vibrant smile that holds me in awe of her time and again!
Bringing a new daughter into our house:
Recently my brother (in-law) got married. And it was with similar gusto, love, and care that my mother-in-law brought the younger daughter-in-law into our beautiful house: the same way she had brought me a few years back. As I witnessed this wonderful moment, it brought me a great sense of happiness: indeed as very few daughters are blessed to have a tender, loving mother-in-law.
With a toast to the unique and special person that you are: here’s wishing you happiness, health, and long life for many years to come, my dear mother-in-law – SHAMIM OLIA.